Napoleon Syndrome...for Women

I think most are familiar with the idea or general concept of Napoleon Syndrome. However have you ever thought about what this really illustrates: males overcompensating their size (height or otherwise 😜) for something else; most often in exchange for power and/or status.  In a nutshell all roads lead to the male ego...nothing new or profound there.

But as we continue to move forward in time there are plenty of other groups that are seeking power. 

Have you ever heard of Josephine or Napoleon's Cleopatra?  The prior was his wife who came into their marriage with baggage as a widow with 2 children, and the latter was his mistress while married to the first.  Under this frame of thought, I wonder: Does Napoleon syndrome exist for the female gender?

How powerful did his wife have to be to prompt being courted by him...and get the ring? Considering her position and her "baggage" how did her happy ending include Napoleon? 

This is clearly open for discussion but perhaps female Napoleon syndrome is perpetuated not just by ego itself but rather by her emotional tie to power which often presents itself to those observing as "power of the vag". Yep...I said it. How often are women utilizing their sex and all that comes with it for the upper edge?

No judgements here; but think about how often television shows highlight powerful women in scenes where they are portrayed as everyday superheroes followed by scenes filled with hot steamy sex or at least a conversation inside a hallway or elevator filled with sexual innuendo's and implied sexual tension; not to mention the additions of scantily clad  attire.

Think about how often in real life the pretty blonde or girl with straight hair or maybe the chick who always wears skirts and heels seemingly is always offered a platform to "lean in". Meanwhile you have observed her doing minimal work.  Maybe be there is a female you know who is always flirting with others and oddly random doors are opened.  Meanwhile you're confused as to how she has so much time to spare for such socializing.  Do you know who I'm talking about? Do you have someone like this in your office? Are you this lady in your agency or organization?  Do you wanna be?

No matter where you fall on the spectrum of using your goodies for advancement; the bigger reality is that this typically works so well, because men are most often in power. So I say...don't stop using your power but let's not judge so harshly those that do. And instead, as a united front of females, let's get more women at the big tables, have more ladies taking seats to make decisions that matter and creating change. Then ladies let's change the stigma.  After all, Napoleon was taken down in the end but it took a united front to make it happen.

Brunch: 10th & Piedmont

It's another month so another brunch was surely in order. This time I chose 10th & Piedmont. The setting is super cute, it's actually located at 10th & Piedmont ( go figure- lol) within the Midtown area. They have huge widows which are retractable! For a nice day you can enjoy all the hustle and bustle as you people watch while folks are enjoying the block or making their way to and from nearby Piedmont Park. Inside the place there was no waiting and the seating availability looks much bigger from inside than one would guess just driving by; however I also had a reservation. The ambiance was comfortable too: they had smooth grooves playing at an appropriate volume such that it could be heard but the chit-chat around you didn't interfere nor did I feel the need to yell across the table at my company. 

The menu is appears to be short and sweet, a varied of options but nothing too eclectic as an offer.  I ordered a southwestern burrito; which I thought was a sure win! Just based upon presentation, I was immediately disappointed to receive a plate that had a tablespoon of pico, which was marketed as salsa. After my first taste I was made quickly aware that perhaps this wasn't the best choice. If I went back again I'd surely order something more traditional like grits and eggs with some sausage. 

My friend ordered chicken and waffles which was quite creative; the chicken was a chicken finger on a stick, wrapped in bacon and dipped in waffle-like batter that was then fried.  Verbally it sounded like "fair" or "festival" food. Visually it looked like corn dogs, a set of 3 mini-corn dogs was served with a legit tablespoon of grits.   The verdict: 3 pieces was more than plenty for taste but not for overall fullness.

So what about the drinks? Just our luck- they had the option of bottomless mimosas! They had flavored mimosas as well; but, they do not have a bottomless option for these. The mimosas had a great balance of champagne and juice and their presentation was great within large constantly flowing glasses.  

Lastly, valet parking was complimentary which was great! Although due to the layout of multiple one-way streets you must go around the moon to capitalize on it.  But it's free! And directly next door so it's worth it.

All in all- 10th & Piedmont is not in my top bracket for brunch but I'd be willing to give it another try. The social aspect of this place is awesome as are the mimosas, which always result in a good time.  Don't let my tastebuds rule yours though...give it a try and drop me a line!

Adulting + Motherhood

Today is Mother's Day! So first let me say thanks to all the great women who are mothers or are active role models for children of close friends and within the family.

Let me next say- most of y'all make it look so easy! Growing up I saw my mom do it all: work, support, cook, clean, come to school functions, discipline,teach, encourage,and etc. The list goes on and on, but she completed it all and did so while looking so graceful, truly not appearing to have skipped a beat.

As I took some time to reflect, not just on my childhood but also on my adulthood to date without the accompaniment of parenthood; I realized I am often tuckered out with just taking care of me. Just completing mundane routine tasks for a party of 1- being only myself. I drag my feet with laundry and chores. I try my best to shop for groceries and prep my meals on one day and only one day a week; anything else will result in  eating out for sure, and this one day of food prep already takes repeated self-coaching.  I cringe at the idea of any randomized "adulting addition": car maintenance, doctor appointments, phone calls regarding adult-life like calling the bank, filing taxes, moving...I'm sure you have a few more to add.

While reflecting, I realized how much I love to sleep, how much I love to make moves based solely on me. I noted how much I enjoy peace and quiet within moments as well as long uninterrupted baths.  I have no additional day to day lives to be concerned with- no kids, no pets, I don't even have a plant! 

Sooooo...I say all that above to say- Adulting is hard. But it sounds like it's only the prelude for this thing we call life. And that makes me speechless...Mom's y'all are the real MVP and not that I'm rushing family duties upon myself but I hope when the time comes I too get initiated into the elite club of "adulting + motherhood" with flying colors. I hope I too appear with effortless grace while I daily on the works around me. So readers- here's to you wherever you fall on the continuum and whatever the next dream is to fulfill. 

Show yourself kindness while you struggle

I recently attended yoga in the park. Before I go any further- let me tell you, I am not a yogi. In fact I've only done yoga a handful of times. 

Even-still, I really enjoy the relaxation and mediation portions of some yoga practices.  And after my experience this week, I'm sure it's my favorite part.

As with any other yoga classes there was an instructor that led the session. What I loved was her transparency about being authentic towards yourself. She constantly reminded us that only you know your limits and only you know when you're focused. (I'm sure it didn't help that she didn't want anyone to hurt themselves in the middle of this loosely structured class held in the corner of Old 4th Ward Skate Park).

As she guided the class she made bunches of reminders about being centered on yourself and mindful of your own limits.  She reminded us that balance can also be from within as opposed to having your left side stretch and right stretch being identical. 

Not only did she make these statements; she also provided more profound commentary- a couple of which statements lingered with me.

1. Show yourself kindness 

How often do you show yourself kindness? Not giving yourself a compliment or a positive affirmation about who you are, what you can accomplish, or what/who you can be; but truly being kind to yourself? Having self compassion.  This took me for a loop because it sounds so simple but I quickly found it takes great discipline to implement this this idea.

2. You cannot end at the beginning.

This lingered because it's the better packaging of one of my life lessons: you must go through the struggle to arrive at success.

These two statement go together. They are both so vital to life- learning to thrive instead of just survive. So I challenge you to show yourself kindness as you go through the struggle. Especially since  we all know: the struggle is real, but now we also know you can be kind to yourself while en route to successfully overcoming it.

Pinwheels for Prevention

For every month of the year there is something that is celebrated or acknowledged; some of these causes are more well known than others. However in the social worker realm one of April's hallmarks is raising the awareness of child abuse prevention.

If this is news to you, don't be alarmed- you're likely not alone. Like most Americans who shun the idea of educating children on sex education often adults and children are unequipped regarding the topic of child sexual abuse as well!  Considering knowledge is power; those who are unaware in this context put power in the hands of perpetrators.  Hence the reason for raising awareness!

Child abuse prevention is supported by  the symbol of a pin-wheel. Have you played with one or seen one before? A pinwheel in itself illustrates childhood- to be young and free without the stresses of the world; that's what the pin-wheel symbolizes.  It also symbolizes  life as a gentle breeze or breath; both of which are revitalizing in context- hence an ever going motion. For children whose lives have been jaded and innocence have been stolen; the pinwheels carry their story and remind us to not allow their story to be in vain; that instead we carry their breath and a potion of their burden and trauma to push forward with voices to create change through awareness.

Join me in the movement! Support the pinwheel! Tell someone about this issue; sexual abuse is only taboo if we allow it to be! Educate a peer, a parent, a co-worker or otherwise about how they can prevent child abuse and keep their loved ones from being at risk! 

Www.georgiacenterforchildadvocacy.org

#GCCA #pinwheelsforprevention

Is Sin City truly Sinful?

I finally made it to..you guessed it: LAS VEGAS!  I've been itching to get to this fun filled city since I turned 21; let's just say it took some time but I finally followed through.

I left before the crack of dawn and found myself in one of the busiest airports ever...you guessed it: Hartsfield-Jackson in good ole ATL.  Perhaps it was my early departure but I had I ran into no major issues; I rolled right through security and reached my gate with ease.

I boarded the plane and was quickly aware of how many children were aboard. I knew it was Spring Break season and initially thought these families must be heading somewhere else on the Western coast by way of Las Vegas; however it was clear this wasn't the case. Children and families were everywhere on the flight and conversation indicated their final stop was the same as mine.

These children were not young adults who can fend for themselves; they were middle and elementary school children at best; in some cases younger. As I roamed Sin City I noticed kids everywhere all day everyday. There were kids enjoying shows and buffets and roaming about the hotel with adults. There were kids in pampers and strollers and I thought - how much would a babysitter/ nanny make out here?

I wondered if this has always been the trend for Sin City; because although it didn't dampen my weekend of epic adventures (and have no doubt they were EPIC), children and full families just weren't part of my vision.

Don't get me wrong I'm not judging but I am very curious - what do kids do in Vegas? What do families do in Vegas? And of all locations on the globe who picks Vegas for a family fun vacation? 

I am genuinely amused, intrigued, and perplexed.  Have other folks seen this? Is it happening in other adult centered cities as well? Would you take your kids? 

In the midst of the question I began to wonder is Sin City truly sinful? Perhaps times have changed city as sin truly has no boundaries. 

Brunch: Highland Bakery

I recently had the delight of enjoying Highland Bakery for Brunch.  This was my first time visiting Highland Bakery, but its reputation precedes itself!

This hot-spot can be easily overlooked;  its a bit disconnected from the rest of the Inman park strip. This is a "pro" for parking; as there is plenty of free street parking to offset the 6 car parking lot of the actual bakery.  But s potential "con" for the added view and fun of neighboring shops.

Highland Bakery is actually a bakery; the entire entry is a shop filled with fresh baked goodies and additional edible treats.  The bakery serves a dual purpose as it's also the lobby for seated meals. 

Saturday was busy but having a small party allotted for a short, 15-20 minute wait. My friend suggested French toast as an appetizer which was such a fatty move, but it was totally worth it! The French toast was of the fluffiest bread I've ever had and was truly toasted to a tasty crunch which held the sweet cream drizzle and syrup; it was accompanied by fresh berry medley.

For my entree I order a breakfast burrito! It was delicious! My eggs and bacon were cooked to perfection (I hate runny scrambled eggs); salsa was on point and on the side so I controlled the temp and sogginess.  I was stuffed to capacity!

The atmosphere was quick paced which resulted in fast service and entrees being served; however with a bigger group it could possibly be hard to catch up in convo over the hustle and bustle.  

Lastly, to my surprise, Highland Bakery is DRY. That's right- no mimosas and surely nothing stronger like a Bloody Mary or Screwdriver. Although the this isn't a requirement for all brunch-ers, if it is for you this isn't your brunch stop.

I would surely eat there again! They have lots of other great options ranging from southern traditional grits to egg Benedict with a vegan flair. Parking is free and manageable. And I can drink afterwards or maybe sit outside and tilt my flask ;)