Sunday, March 9, 2014

Are You Mary Jane?




I finally watched the movie and full series of being Mary Jane which aired on BET and concluded last month. There was a good amount of conversation prompted by the show as it portrayed a 38 year old African American women who is career driven  but  appears lacking in countless other areas of life- especially love and pursuing her "happily ever after".  Without giving too much away- her mother suffered from the disease lupus, her older brother is a recovering drug addict, her younger brother is a  "professional student" that also deals drugs, and her father is the head of the household trying to keep all his ducks in a row. Meanwhile Mary Jane, played by Gabrielle Union, provides [money] to her family when needed and often deflects her shortcomings in life by almost fixating on her extended family and countless hours devoted to her work; along the way, she attempts to engage in relationships as a foundation for her happily ever after.

I will admit, I'm a bit behind the curve on the show as the last episode aired in February; but as the show became a conversation piece especially within the African American community and also in comparison to the character Olivia Pope, played by Kerry Washington, I was persuaded to invest some time on the trending topic. As the series continued to gain steam and her goals were projected on my personal television screen, one episode after another, I found myself wiping tears from my cheeks: her struggle is REAL. This series illustrated the struggle of truly having it all; as black women set standards but continue to seek love within her race while pursuing careers or furthering their educational expertise.  I am this women!

As Georgia Tech alum that also earned a masters degree before the age of 25; that has recently been blessed with an opportunity to begin a career related to my degrees before the age of 30- I can easily see myself and close friends living the struggle that Mary Jane so clearly illustrates.  This has been a topic of conversation between myself and several friends, associates, and co-workers as we often feel pressured to accept the possibility that we cannot have it all and that if we do the happily ever after will not be upheld to our ideal standard. The doubt creeps in: "maybe I can't have it all", "perhaps my standards are too strict", "it must just be me".

The struggle pursued by Mary Jane made my heart heavy and poured over my eyelids in a brief moment of silence but later escalated to tumultuous tears much like the waterfall in Niagara.  The realism of her situation and it's applicability to my life currently and as the future turns present and passes with rising and setting of the sun; this struggle is real, even if not in its true form but in our thoughts and actions. 

If you have not yet seen the movie or series I challenge you to do so; especially if you are female and/or African American.  If you find yourself in the pursue of love, happiness, or enjoyment of your happily ever after- you should watch it too.   For those of you who relate to the storyline and the ideals presented;I challenge you: dare to be bold! Release your stresses and relax your mind in relation to this topic.  Feel free in knowing you are not alone and accepting that true love, everlasting love cannot be rushed. Have faith in yourself that when the time and person is right you will know. Have faith that your happily ever after is coming we are all someone's princess en route to becoming a queen.  Are you ready?  So learn your lessons along the way, not just cooking and cleaning but communicating effectively and refining morals such as faith and loyalty.  Do you take this dare?! You should...because I'm hopeful and optimistic that a king specially selected for you awaits. 
   

                          




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